my name is Tim.

I once phoned myself by mistake. Cats adore me. I make great bonfires. I love soft, gentle rain. On a road trip through Lesotho with two friends I spotted the Lesser Known Bald-Headed Ibus. I often leave home without a jersey, but hardly ever get sick. I have an affinity for puddles. I recently saved a bonsai tree from an army of vicious aphids. I am a qualified cricket umpire. I've learnt that nothing worth knowing can ever be taught.

I once won a chess tournament and bowled a perfect strike in tenpin bowling. Last week I spent R184.56 on postage stamps. I believe in God and that He loves us very much. I can never remember my own cellphone number, even though I majored in Maths. People dig my mixed tapes. I am good at fixing broken sunglasses. I once canoed 36 km in two days. I believe you cannot make someone love you - the most you can be is someone to be loved.

I've slept on the ground, under the stars, beside a fire. I can't play guitar - but would love to learn. In the boot of my car there is currently a towel, a chessboard, a shirt, a Springbok Rugby Jersey and a boomerang. I always save drowning moths and insects from the bath. I have calculated the earth's gravitational constant using a pebble and a stopwatch. I am a terrible clothes shopper. I have tested the dispersion properties of telephone cables in loemfontein.

I have never run out of petrol. I make yummy mini pizzas. My table tennis skills are legendary. I once photographed a shoe. My barber is deaf. I seldom throw anything away. I am not afraid of spiders. I once looked on the cover of a dictionary to find out how to spell the word 'dictionary'. I have never been close to a whale. Last holiday bought a coconut purely for a conversation piece. I won a Eagles Country cd in a putting competition and a Christina Aglilera cd on the radio - I gave both away. I never consult maps. I am able to calculate the speed of light using only a microwave and a block of cheese. I always sing along - even if I don't know the words.

Playing darts with me is unsafe. I love sunsets - but always miss sunrises. I am too lazy to set the clock or timer on my VCR. I've made ice-cream using cream, sugar and liquid nitrogen. For someone who doesn't drink coffee I spend far too much time at coffe shops. The only subject I got a distingtion for in school is Afrikaans Tweede Taal. I've written poetry that nobody will ever read. I can never remember peoples names. I almost set myself on fire doing chemistry. I am terrible at doing paperwork.

My greatest ideas for inventions include “Brandy Floss” - alcoholic candy floss. Visitors from distant lands are impressed by my nachos. I would estimate that 98.6% of my friends do not own umbrellas. I have dined on the Mauritian Red Snapper. There is someone saved on my phone under the name "Crazy_Guy_Dont_Answer"………


*gosh, you made my day Tim ! I had an online conversation with him just now and i couldn't stop laughing. thank you so muchhhh man, you rock ! =)